Never Being Satisfied

I grew up in the countryside of Japan, surrounded by beautiful mountains and beautiful ocean. The life I lived seemed to be no different than any other, but I felt as if there was something missing deep within my heart that couldn’t be satisfied. “Is there something different? Why am I alive? Is this the way a human being should live? Does God exist?” Many thoughts came to my mind, but I ended up ignoring them, because I couldn’t find the answer, and I couldn’t trust anybody anyway.

The Fear of Death

The fear of death comes with many faces. Some people have a great fear that loved ones will die, some think that violence will befall them, some over-eat, and others have their funeral plans and burial plot all in order. For me, I closed my mind so completely to the inevitability of death that I had no fear of death. Or so I thought.

A Rebel With a Weary Soul As a child I fell in love with Jesus of the bible.  Growing up in a non-denominational church, I heard all the stories in Sunday school.  My mother directed plays about Jesus, my father played the role of Jesus and was a very evangelistic minister.  My parents were divorced when I was a very young child and they were remarried shortly after.  We were featured on a well known evangelical TV show as a story of the amazing healing power of Jesus in our life.  Sadly, this reconciliation did not last and in my early teen years my parents once again divorced. 

Redeemer “...help...” My desperate cry for help began as a whisper, slipping spontaneously from my lips. Late at night, alone in my darkened house, I couldn't sleep, I had paced miles of circles my house. I was hopelessly thinking in circles, too. Over and over I reconsidered what I had said; what she had said. What I did; what she did. What I would do next... or not.

Why Wander? So many people like to wander around with no responsibilities, no obstacles. So when the going gets rough they leave and travel in the wind. It blows them to and fro, but they don't find anything to put their roots down into. They don't find anything to put their heart into. They don't find anything worth fighting for.

Have You Met Him? This is what happened when I came to visit the Community.

A Land Without Compromise I loved talking to the people about real things, and how everyone always had an answer. No matter what, there was always an answer. It satisfied. It was real. I sat down at lunch and heard truth. I worked in the garden and heard truth. It resounded deep down in there. It made the same sound my heart was always saying. It matched.

I Was a Loner

I was a loner. And a cynic. I pored over philosophy books on Friday nights with a box of wine. The little time I did spend with other people ended in debates over the state of humanity, which I believed was doomed. I went to class. I wrote my papers. I passed by on the conveyor belt largely unnoticed. I listened to music, blasting, in my apartment in the slums of Worcester, Massachusetts. I would go hiking and camping whenever my meager funds allowed me. I prided myself in being a headstrong woman, rejecting all the societal norms that tried to confine me.

First John May Cause You Trouble The words of First John caused trouble at first, but then were the answer to one young's search for the answers he sought.

One Hundred Times As Much Paul's father wanted his religion to be real. He gave up farms and brought his family into an abundant life of one hundred times as much.

Sharat Finds His Purpose You might think he had it made. He graduated from an ivy league university and was working on Wall Street. But Sharat was not satisfied.

If They Care For The Flowers

Ruhamah came to the community in our beginnings.  A simple message was spoken to her heart, that if they take care of the flowers, they would take care of her, too.